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Karadzic charged at the Hague
by flake gordon Thursday, Jul 31 2008, 12:42pm
international / miscellaneous / opinion/analysis

Radovan Karadzic appeared in the dock at the Hague today charged with invading oil rich nations on the pretext they possessed WMD. The Former Bosnian Serb leader faces genocide charges for causing the deaths of over 750,000 innocent Iraqi civilians. He was also accused of surgical missile strikes on numerous wedding parties in Afghanistan, which resulted in the deaths of dozens of civilians including women and children. The Bosnian Serb leader insisted the wedding parties were in fact Muslim terrorists planning the overthrow of the entire world!

Pick the 'real' Karadzic!
Pick the 'real' Karadzic!

Prosecutors also requested retrospective powers in order to charge Karadzic with complicity in the fire bombing of Dresden during WWII and recommending that nuclear weapons be tested on two Japanese civilian cities/targets. The court rejected the request but accepted charges for carpet bombing Indo-Chinese nations during the Vietnam war, a tactic that resulted in three million civilian deaths.

Karadzic was also charged with planning the motorcade route that President Jack Kennedy took in Dallas, which resulted in his assassination – a number of unnecessary corners/turns in the route ensured that a moving target directly faced Serbian snipers on the grassy knoll.

Evidence was submitted implicating Karadzic in the plan to test the effects of Sarin and Vx nerve gas on allied Australian troops, though tests were cancelled by the serving Australian Prime Minister, Harold Holt, who disappeared while skin diving shortly thereafter. Reports of sightings of a man roaming the mountain forests of Bosnia-Montenegro in a wetsuit continue to this day.

Karadzic was also charged with planting thermite demolition charges in WTC7 and organising a number of passenger jets to be fitted with digital navigation receivers that would override cockpit controls. State of the art passenger jet ‘evaporation technology’ was also attributed to the evil Serbian genius. Every jet hijacked by Serbs on 9/11 completely evaporated on impact, Karadzic has resisted all attempts to date to force him to divulge his secret method of making passenger jets completely disappear when impacted!

Karadzic was also accused of trying to kill George W Bush’s dad and writing poetry for Donald Rumsfeld -- two poems, ode to ‘unknown knowns’ and ‘mission accomplished’ were submitted as evidence.

Nobel Peace Laureate and humanitarian, George W Bush requested that Karadizic be acquitted and that the world adopts the Christian principle of forgiveness – judges at the Hague promised to consider the request.


IT’S TIME TO TAKE A REALITY PILL, PEOPLE!


 
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